Thursday, October 23, 2008
fuck poker
So this month has been terrible. I have done two sessions of coaching and still cant get it right or i am just running terrible. I dont think its all running bad. If I play a draw fast I get told to play it slow and vice versa. I am fucking done with it for at least a little while. No fucking reason that I have played for as long as i have and still cant beat fucking online retards. I ma tired of wasting my life and money trying to be good at this when it seems this fucking impossible.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Fucking poker gods/charter and I have a new nemesis
Ok so it has been a little bit since I have posted a blog. I have been dabbling in donkaments as of late and have been getting deep but then getting FUCKED at the end.
On Saturday I play a tourney where first place is $3k and I am getting pretty deep when I made a semi bad play and lost my stack. I was disappointed but I think his play is worse than mine is. Whatever, no big deal. Traditional wisdom says that limping is bad but there were lots of limped pots so I decided to take a shot. I think my line here is super strong and I think his call with the non-nut flush draw is bad.
Sunday I am sitting here with Melissa and I decide to see if any tourneys are going on. I login and there is a $10 with Rebuys and add-ons going on and I decide to jump in, since there is an $80k guarantee. I spend about $50 total and start to do really well picking up chips and running super hot. At about the second break I am in the top 20 in chips. We are on break. I go to take a leak and come back and my internet is not working. No big deal the breaks are 5 minutes long so I can restart my modem and my router and that fixes it (piece of shit Charter internet). I do this about 4 or 5 times and nothing is working and I am freaking out now, the tourney has by now started back and I am being blinded off.
This tourney is a huge deal $12k for first and second place is $9k, so I am walking around pacing, thinking. I try the desktop and it doesn't work. I look down at the modem and the lights are flashing, (I know I paid the bill). I start calling anyone and everyone I know who might have Pokerstars installed on their computer, they are all playing poker at a home game and not answering my calls at first, I finally get a hold of one and his internet is out as well.. My iphone is lagging a little bit as I am furiously dialing trying to get to anyone, I am so pissed and I almost chunk it against the wall, but I stop myself barely.
I am using my wireless to look for any other network, thank god I live in an older community where the people don't know how to lock their networks. Unfortunately they all have Charter as well, people really should have a little fucking choice in their provider, and I can't connect. Melissa is just watching me pace, I am anticipating how mad my neighbors will be when I start hitting the walls. I am trying to think of some place I can go to to use Wi-fi and then Melissa brings up Bakerstreet pub. It is this bar that we go to and its super close, I decide that its my only chance.
I run to the bedroom slap on some shoes and grab the laptop and dash out the door like a fat kid when the lunch lady announces they have enough to give seconds. I open the laptop up on my passenger seat and drive to the bar trying to pick up networks along the way. Not paying attention, running stop signs, no seatbelt, fuck it the cop can have a cut of $12k.
I get to the bar and sign in and half of my fucking chips are gone. I try to calm down the roar in my ears it sounds like am in a conch shell. I pick up a few hands that I can steal, then I get KK in the big blind and it folds around to the small blind and I am cussing and pissed because I know he will fold and I win the blinds, fucking great. I look away for a minute and then hear the attention beep and I look down semi interested. Not only has this fucking chump called, he open shoved for a ridicalously large amount. I gleefully call and expect to see aces, yes that is my luck, but no he has a premium hand of 78 off suit.
My kings hold up and the guy is pissed cussing in chat and someone calls the moderator. "we understand that this is an adult site, but everyone is here to have fun, please watch the language." Kiss my ass cock smoke, I am trying to play here. So now I am back up to what I was before the poker gods/fucking charter decided to fuck with me. I steal a few more hands, and am doing well, I raise a hand and miss and have to fold. I win a huge pot where I raise 79s on the button and the cheap leader calls and the flop is 987 and I get a call when he checks and I bet. The turn is a 9 giving me a full house, I shove for less than the pot and he snap calls with Ace nine. The river is a blank and all of the sudden I am second in chips.
I am feeling pretty good and am talking to my friend on the phone and he makes an interesting statement. "Do you know if the bar turns off their Wi-fi after 2?" Suddenly I am back in the conch shell my head is roaring, my balls are in my intestines. I get off the phone with the intention to go ask the bouncer as he is telling the drunk tcu trust fund bitches that the bar is closing in 5 minutes. Then I decide I cant leave and will look up the number and call. I find the number and put it in my phone and hit call. I wait for a second and then FUCK, its an automated system. Piece of shit, I guess I will have to go ask.
I hear the ding for attention, I look down on the button with aces. Holy shit this is it, a guy in middle position raises. I think, 'maybe just call because a rereaise looks so strong', the tricky part of my brain thinks, 'FUCK that,' the analytical side chimes in, 'raise that shit up'. I repop it and the small blind calls which is random and odd, but whatever the original raiser calls and we see the flop of 678 with two diamonds. The small blind who is second in chips overall (i lost some chips due to huge antes and blinds, damn turbo structure) bets the minimum and the original raiser folds and its my action. I am thinking about how much to bet when I look up and see the pot is more than my stack, I shove hoping to see him fold.
I am chanting to myself "Please no set, please no set...just fold, or call with Ace 7." He calls and shows 44. He has an underpair and a gut shot for the majority of his stack. He has 6 outs to win this hand. My head is spinning as I am looking at the board and his hand wondering if I am missing something. Then it dawns on me, wow this guy just crippled himself with only 6 outs. The turn is a 7, my tribal chant has changed to the rendition of, "NO 5, NO 5..." River.....5. I drop my phone as the automated system is still giving me the bar's hours and my guts wrench up. I am out in 37th place for $150.
I stare at the screen with my mouth hanging open, you have got to be fucking kidding me, come here moderator I have some choice words for you now. I dodge 6 outs and I have like $2.8 million in chips and can coast to the final table. Disheartening to say the least, play two tournies two nights in a row and cash but get fucked both times. I close the laptop and drive back home to the apartment in a much safer white knuckled manner than the previous drive.
Drk confidant my new nemesis, I loathe you with force that will never be rivaled, I hope you die in a grease fire. I would do terrible things to your belongings. Before I close the laptop I see him dump off around 700k in chips. I dont know if he even made it to the final table. I will check tomorrow once my internet is working and I call Charter and tell them I want a free month of service for all this bullshit.
The Hand is here if you want it
http://weaktight.com/455204
Grammer and punctuation are not important when I am pissed, that is why this is so bad lol.
On Saturday I play a tourney where first place is $3k and I am getting pretty deep when I made a semi bad play and lost my stack. I was disappointed but I think his play is worse than mine is. Whatever, no big deal. Traditional wisdom says that limping is bad but there were lots of limped pots so I decided to take a shot. I think my line here is super strong and I think his call with the non-nut flush draw is bad.
Sunday I am sitting here with Melissa and I decide to see if any tourneys are going on. I login and there is a $10 with Rebuys and add-ons going on and I decide to jump in, since there is an $80k guarantee. I spend about $50 total and start to do really well picking up chips and running super hot. At about the second break I am in the top 20 in chips. We are on break. I go to take a leak and come back and my internet is not working. No big deal the breaks are 5 minutes long so I can restart my modem and my router and that fixes it (piece of shit Charter internet). I do this about 4 or 5 times and nothing is working and I am freaking out now, the tourney has by now started back and I am being blinded off.
This tourney is a huge deal $12k for first and second place is $9k, so I am walking around pacing, thinking. I try the desktop and it doesn't work. I look down at the modem and the lights are flashing, (I know I paid the bill). I start calling anyone and everyone I know who might have Pokerstars installed on their computer, they are all playing poker at a home game and not answering my calls at first, I finally get a hold of one and his internet is out as well.. My iphone is lagging a little bit as I am furiously dialing trying to get to anyone, I am so pissed and I almost chunk it against the wall, but I stop myself barely.
I am using my wireless to look for any other network, thank god I live in an older community where the people don't know how to lock their networks. Unfortunately they all have Charter as well, people really should have a little fucking choice in their provider, and I can't connect. Melissa is just watching me pace, I am anticipating how mad my neighbors will be when I start hitting the walls. I am trying to think of some place I can go to to use Wi-fi and then Melissa brings up Bakerstreet pub. It is this bar that we go to and its super close, I decide that its my only chance.
I run to the bedroom slap on some shoes and grab the laptop and dash out the door like a fat kid when the lunch lady announces they have enough to give seconds. I open the laptop up on my passenger seat and drive to the bar trying to pick up networks along the way. Not paying attention, running stop signs, no seatbelt, fuck it the cop can have a cut of $12k.
I get to the bar and sign in and half of my fucking chips are gone. I try to calm down the roar in my ears it sounds like am in a conch shell. I pick up a few hands that I can steal, then I get KK in the big blind and it folds around to the small blind and I am cussing and pissed because I know he will fold and I win the blinds, fucking great. I look away for a minute and then hear the attention beep and I look down semi interested. Not only has this fucking chump called, he open shoved for a ridicalously large amount. I gleefully call and expect to see aces, yes that is my luck, but no he has a premium hand of 78 off suit.
My kings hold up and the guy is pissed cussing in chat and someone calls the moderator. "we understand that this is an adult site, but everyone is here to have fun, please watch the language." Kiss my ass cock smoke, I am trying to play here. So now I am back up to what I was before the poker gods/fucking charter decided to fuck with me. I steal a few more hands, and am doing well, I raise a hand and miss and have to fold. I win a huge pot where I raise 79s on the button and the cheap leader calls and the flop is 987 and I get a call when he checks and I bet. The turn is a 9 giving me a full house, I shove for less than the pot and he snap calls with Ace nine. The river is a blank and all of the sudden I am second in chips.
I am feeling pretty good and am talking to my friend on the phone and he makes an interesting statement. "Do you know if the bar turns off their Wi-fi after 2?" Suddenly I am back in the conch shell my head is roaring, my balls are in my intestines. I get off the phone with the intention to go ask the bouncer as he is telling the drunk tcu trust fund bitches that the bar is closing in 5 minutes. Then I decide I cant leave and will look up the number and call. I find the number and put it in my phone and hit call. I wait for a second and then FUCK, its an automated system. Piece of shit, I guess I will have to go ask.
I hear the ding for attention, I look down on the button with aces. Holy shit this is it, a guy in middle position raises. I think, 'maybe just call because a rereaise looks so strong', the tricky part of my brain thinks, 'FUCK that,' the analytical side chimes in, 'raise that shit up'. I repop it and the small blind calls which is random and odd, but whatever the original raiser calls and we see the flop of 678 with two diamonds. The small blind who is second in chips overall (i lost some chips due to huge antes and blinds, damn turbo structure) bets the minimum and the original raiser folds and its my action. I am thinking about how much to bet when I look up and see the pot is more than my stack, I shove hoping to see him fold.
I am chanting to myself "Please no set, please no set...just fold, or call with Ace 7." He calls and shows 44. He has an underpair and a gut shot for the majority of his stack. He has 6 outs to win this hand. My head is spinning as I am looking at the board and his hand wondering if I am missing something. Then it dawns on me, wow this guy just crippled himself with only 6 outs. The turn is a 7, my tribal chant has changed to the rendition of, "NO 5, NO 5..." River.....5. I drop my phone as the automated system is still giving me the bar's hours and my guts wrench up. I am out in 37th place for $150.
I stare at the screen with my mouth hanging open, you have got to be fucking kidding me, come here moderator I have some choice words for you now. I dodge 6 outs and I have like $2.8 million in chips and can coast to the final table. Disheartening to say the least, play two tournies two nights in a row and cash but get fucked both times. I close the laptop and drive back home to the apartment in a much safer white knuckled manner than the previous drive.
Drk confidant my new nemesis, I loathe you with force that will never be rivaled, I hope you die in a grease fire. I would do terrible things to your belongings. Before I close the laptop I see him dump off around 700k in chips. I dont know if he even made it to the final table. I will check tomorrow once my internet is working and I call Charter and tell them I want a free month of service for all this bullshit.
The Hand is here if you want it
http://weaktight.com/455204
Grammer and punctuation are not important when I am pissed, that is why this is so bad lol.
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